Thursday, November 13, 2014

Leading Yourself Before the One

John 5:9: Grudge not one against another, brethren, lest ye be condemned: behold, the judge standeth before the door.

Before attending University 101, my Lion was struggling to show respect in a particular relationship.  My Hyena was choosing to react to their Hyena instead of my Lion choosing to act and set an example. My inability to influence my own behavior and to be the Lion I wanted to be frustrated me. Frequently during University 101, I wondered how I could influence myself and the other person with whom I had conflict, to be even better.

After University 101, I shared with a friend some of the incredible lessons I had learned. I learned that we must be able to lead ourselves before we can lead the one, the group and the multitude. My friend seemed really interested in what I had to share, however, our talk turned to the person with whom I had been having conflict before attending University 101. We both started criticizing this person and their inability to lead themselves and therefore the one or the group.

Later that day, the Heavenly Guide inspired me to read James 5 in the New Testament. I was reminded that I should not grudge (backbite) others and judge them.   My Hyena tells me that I am above others when I compare their weaknesses to my strengths.  However, I learned from University 101 that growth is not a linear path. It has edges that go off in all different directions. Judging others, including myself, is a negative behavior pattern that I need to change.  Our Creator gave us our Lion and Hyena to provide opposition in all things.  Our Hyena empowers our Lion.  Without it, there would be no opposition and therefore we would not have agency. The Creator gave us weakness that we may be humble and become strong by overcoming it. When we criticize ourselves or others for a weakness, we may be in danger of criticizing the Creator.  Am I going to change this negative behavior pattern of judging overnight? Probably not. However, I am more aware of it now and that is step one. How can I lead the one if I can't consistently lead myself?

I wondered how I could show more respect for this person whom I had judged. I was inspired to give them admiration and to think of something that they had done for me that I was grateful for. This was part of the Morning Empowerment and had helped me so much with respect to increasing my love and respect for my husband. This morning, I sent this person an admiration and they seemed to really appreciate it. I also decided to clear the air with my friend and share with them this lesson that I am sharing with you. Every time I think it’s someone else that needs to change, it always comes back to me. I need to lead myself before I can lead the one…

Sunday, November 9, 2014

Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone

At University101, Brandon talked about this one thing that has awakened me from a deep slumber.  If you do this one thing, then you will be able to live life with incredible certainty and confidence.  If you don’t do this one thing, you will face the same trials repeatedly and experience unnecessary pain.  And the one thing that Brandon taught me is that you need to be willing to be uncomfortable now to be comfortable later.

Before I learned this one thing, I struggled for years to make decisions and reach goals that would help me to feel happy and fulfilled in my life.  After I learned this one thing, I quickly made decisions and reached goals that that gave me peace, joy and happiness. Let me share with you a story…

A life pattern was revealed to me when I realized that most major decisions in my life were based on what was convenient for me in the short-term vs. what was best for me in the long-term.  Each time I came to the edge of my understanding and had the opportunity to take the next step, I backed off to feel relief. The connection I hadn’t clearly made until Brandon taught it in University 101 was that I did this because I did not have deep trust in the Creator. I did not have a desire to know his will for me because I was afraid of what he would ask me to do.

After I became aware of this life pattern, I had a “dark night of the soul.  Seeing how my Hyena has blinded me to this knowledge has been an excruciatingly painful realization. However, I also realize that the Creator gave me that part of myself because there must be opposition in all things. He gave me that part of myself so that it could empower my Lion to overcome it and by doing so, I would be made stronger.

On the bright side, this knowledge has given me the courage to make some huge changes in my life over the last few months such as receiving my endowments, getting my Patriarchal Blessing and deciding to have another baby.  It’s also giving me the courage to make some other huge life changes in the next few months that I was unwilling to even consider at the beginning of this year.  I know it’s going to be hard work. I can’t see all the steps in front of me…but that’s not the point. I have finally realized that the point is that I need to develop that deep trust in the Creator and that he wants to give me so much more. However, before he can do that, he needs to stretch me to make a little more room inside my soul so that I can receive it. As he does that, I just need to trust that He is not going to let me fall as I walk over that edge…

Saturday, November 8, 2014

MIssing Out on Something

My husband and I were at the Las Vegas airport waiting for our flight home after we had attended Higher Laws University 101 in St. George, UT. Since we had about 2.5 hours to spare before our flight left, we surveyed all the restaurants near our gate to determine our options. Since both of us had been eating out at restaurants all week (with the exception of some healthy snacks) my body was telling me that it needed a salad. However, my taste buds were telling me that they needed a burger from Carl’s Jr., a fast food chain restaurant that we don’t have in Canada and that I had never tried before. As a compromise, I got a salad and green smoothie from a Mediterranean restaurant and a burger from Carl’s Jr.

Near our gate, we ran into Kyle McNeil, our
Higher Laws Personal Results Specialist. Kyle said that his flight did not leave for a couple of hours and that he was interested in getting some food. I sheepishly told him how I had made a compromise and got a burger and a salad to eat on the plane. I explained to him how I really didn’t feel like eating another fast food burger but I had never tried Carl’s Jr. before. Then he said, “So you feel like you would be missing out on something...”

I told him that I had never really thought of it that way before and thanked him for this awareness. Then Kyle continued by saying, “That’s what your Hyena will tell you but you’re not missing out on anything…”

After we boarded the plane, I stared out the window for several hours. Kyle’s simple statement had such deep impact on me. I experienced a “dark night of the soul” and my heart ached as I thought about all the things I was really missing out on. I wish I could chase my son on the playground. I wish I could run the way he could. I wish I didn’t stress out that I could not run and catch up to my son if he got too far ahead of me on the sidewalk. I wish I had more energy and vitality. I wish I had more choices in the clothes I could wear and buy. I wish I could bend over and tie my shoes and still be able to breathe and that the zipper on my pants wouldn’t pop open. I wish I could walk down the aisle of the bus at work and not have to walk sideways. I wish I felt more attractive and sexy for myself and my husband. I wish I could dance the way I used to. These are truly the things I am missing out on.

I am so grateful to Kyle for helping me to see my Hyena. It was a painful realization but now I think I am ready to take the next step towards a bright new future…

Friday, November 7, 2014

The Edge at University 101

On the first morning of University 101, I groggily walked up to the registration table. Immediately a lady that I recognized from The Answer to Everything kindly notified me that there was a line for the registration. I looked and saw several people standing in line behind her. Embarrassed, I apologized for not noticing that there was a line and went to the end of it. “Man, I am not even here for 5 minutes and I am already ticking somebody off”, I thought to myself.

For the rest of University 101, I thought this lady had a really bad first impression of me. When I saw her in the event room or in the convention center on breaks, I tried to catch her eye so that I could give her a smile but we never seemed to make direct eye contact. This lady had a real presence and power about her, and I felt really intimidated by her. I thought to myself, “She doesn’t like me…”

Near the very end of the event, Brandon Broadwater asked us to change partners again. I saw this lady sitting beside her husband and the Heavenly Guide prompted me to go over and sit next to her. I mustered up my courage, slid into the seat next to her and asked her if she wanted to be my partner. She gave me this huge smile and happily agreed.

We quickly discovered that we actually had allot of things in common and were enjoying some wonderful discussions. I admitted to her that I had felt intimidated by her all week and that coming and sitting next to her had been an edge for me. She was so surprised by this admission and was concerned that she had done something wrong. However, I assured her that she had been tenderly upfront with me at the registration table and that my own insecurities were the problem.

She admired that I had the courage to overcome my fears and was grateful that she had been open to my request as she had already made plans to be partners with her husband. Before the end of the event, she and I exchanged contact information and were grateful that we’d had the opportunity to meet and get to know each other.

 I learned that when I move out of my comfort zone and am open and willing to take a chance on making a connection, I am serving myself and others with the gift of possibility. You never know the treasures you may be unwrapping.

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

When the Student is Ready, the Teacher Appears

During the first 2 days of Relationship Mastery at University 101, my husband and I were partners. I could tell from his physiology that he was really struggling with state.   At the supper break on day 2, I asked my husband what was going on for him. He said that he felt like all he could think about when Brandon Broadwater was teaching us were the mistakes that he had made in life.

On day 3 of University 101, we had just finished Relationship Mastery and started Mastering Influence. We went to lunch at a restaurant across the street for the first time. At the end of our meal, our server gave us our bill and noticed our name tags with the Higher Laws logo. At first, I started telling her about Higher Laws and how they were principles that produced results. Then, my normally introverted husband started carrying the conversation. He was telling her all about Higher Laws and how much they had already changed our lives. She said that it sounded exactly like something she needed and said that she was experiencing allot of struggles in life. We exchanged contact information and the web address for Higher Laws. Before she left, I asked her if I could give her a hug and we had a warm embrace right there in the restaurant. She declared to us exuberantly, “You guys are my angels!!!” After she left the table, I saw the look in my husband’s face as it filled with emotion. I saw the impact that this exchange had on him. When we got back to the conference center after lunch, I witnessed a complete change in state for my husband.

At the end of day 3, my husband and I stopped to take pictures of the St. George temple of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day-Saints. There we met a young man who had been pondering and praying in the garden about the direction for his life. We both shared with this young man how applying Higher Laws had helped us make decisions in our life despite our circumstances. Again, I shared my contact information and the web address for Higher Laws. We ended up having another late night but it was worth it. At the supper break on day 4, my husband and I had another opportunity to share the Higher Laws message with our server. With each encounter, I saw my husband’s state bolster.

Brandon taught us that the Creator was going to give us opportunities to use the tools we’d learned in Higher Laws to serve others. It was amazing to witness the truth of the old adage “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear”. The Creator sent these teachers to show his trust in and unconditional love for us and those we serve. When can let our lights shine and feel that true joy and happiness in His service, we can know for a surety that it has glorified Him.